Correct me if I'm wrong, but I think that part of the problem is that you're asking yourself if you're wrong for asking this to yourself. Maybe taking little break and instead thinking about what you feel is right could help?
You're not wrong to question your beliefs! It's actually very philosophical to think about things like this! I'm agnostic, which in this case means not knowing in a religious sense. Personally, I think that it's okay to believe whatever you believe, as long as you're not attacking others for having different beliefs. I'm basically trying to say that you don't have to get stressed out about it, and don't join a cult. I hope you can come to a satisfactory resolution!
I get u, I was just born and then Ig my whole family just "made" me christian. Now that I think about it, I never had a choice- But idk I always get confused